Once again the cycling world is abuzz with the latest doper to be caught. This time the silver medalist at the Bejing Olympics had CERA coursing through his veins while on the course. The disappointment in the pro ranks and its fans is palpable.
A spokesperson for Happy Lucky 88 Manufactory's Cockle testing apparatus asserts that, "The offender should have used Enhanced Power Output (E.P.O.) and its secret masking ingredient invisible agent D.O.P.E. A negative Cockle test is always guaranteed under the supervision of trained HL88 personnel. When will cheating cycling people realize that the Cockle test is a safe,cheap, easy, and somewhat unsavoury means to Happy Lucky results?"
Happy Lucky 88 Manufactory bears no responsibility for false claims from its products.
1 comment:
H2O,
Team Vitesse has long asserted that one mans trash is another mans treasure....and that this does not only apply to rotting plywood but also riders of tainted history. We feel that under the supervision of Johan these riders will learn the meaning of clean living, just listen to what he says not what he does, after all words do speak louder then actions (when was the last time one of your "actions" was auditory....and I don't mean following a pre-race meal of beans).
While these riders may have shady pasts, rumors of doping, chimeric twins, or pets named "brillo" they are deserving of a second chance, as long as it is with Team Vitesse
So I say send us you fallen, your bruised, your drugged to the nines....once they see the genius of Johan and the technical superiority of Happy Lucky 88 plywooderific products they will have no reason to slip back into their dirty habits (and if they do D.O.P.E is there to help).
So cut them some slack, step up to the plate, draw a line in the sand and ask not what can Johan do for you but what you can do for Johan!!
Unrepentantly yours
K2nees
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