Questions to ask Lance

Cycling cosmonaut has thought long and hard about the upcoming interview of big ego Lance by big ego Oprah.  Here on this blog is an open post to Oprah with the top ten questions that cycling cosmonaut would ask Lance:

1. Do the needles hurt?
2. How many bikes do you own?
3. Are Tyler and Floyd still your drinking buddies?
4. Are you going to squeal on Team Vitesse sponsored by HL88?
5. Do you use chamois cream in the berry area?
6. Are you considering being a contestant on Wheel of Fortune?
7. Has your hat size decreased as a result of the USADA report?
8. What is your favourite colour? Yellow?
9. Do your children know you are a lying swine?
10. How do you live with yourself?