Due to the avalanche of correspondence concerning Happy Lucky 88's cockle testing protocol, I have secured a flowchart/schematic from that company's Scientific Testing Laboratory of Manufactory. The experts revealed few details about the "Plywood Interface" except to say that "probing cockles for always goodness". Obviously there is nothing to worry about judging from Happy Lucky 88's exemplary track record of product development and quality.
A team member responds: I am pleased to see that Happy Lucky 88 has stepped up to put a plywood facade on cockle testing. Recent unrest in the cycling world seems to require big budget teams (and here I would argue that Team Vitesse is a team of such stature, for what we don't have in budget we more then make up for in plywood and the size of our cockles) to have strict testing regimes to ensure clean riding. Congratulations to Happy Lucky 88 for so splendidly interfacing their superior plywood product with our head scientist (or scientist head). Surely with all those wires it has to work. By also putting on this facade Team Vitesse can maintain the appearance of rigor why still actively recruiting riders such as Basso, Ricco, Schumacher, and Landis. Team Vitesse will need all the help it can get if we wish to enter next years Grand Tours. After all the only difference between us and a certain Texan is the presence of our cockles, and if size does matter we are looking to the top step of the podium! Yours, K2nees