Vitesse in Venice

Team Vitesse has gathered equipment and riders in Venice to prepare for the Team Time Trial on Saturday. Preparations are going well and any problems with the Prosperous Contented Obstruction Blocking are being hammered out. Each day the Sublime Motion Enhanced Velocity Enlightenment Computation (SMEVEC 88) is calibrated to Venitian mean time. The Team Time Trial will be the first true test of Happy Lucky 88's plywood engineering revolution.
Team members stay in what locals are calling "il Citi di Plywoodi". Each evening Team Vitesse "circles" the ferrings on Piazza San Marco to relax, recuperate, reduce, reuse, recapitulate, recalibrate and recline in their Plycra jerseys. Compared to the conditions in the wilds of Mesopotamia earlier this year, team members find the ground of the piazza quite comfortable. The team feels safe because rabid dogs and devious swamp lizards have yet to penetrate downtown Venice.
Rumours swirl around Venice concerning Astana's financial crisis. Apparently many Kazakh sponsors are refusing to honour their commitments. Could this mean that Lance and Levi might have to camp out under the plywood like regular bike racers?
Vitesse riders can rest assured that Happy Lucky 88 Manufactory and its secretive partners are backing them all the way to the finish line in Rome on May 31.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Hmmm....in these tough economic times (ITTET) even the Yellow Banded One is not immune. Ironically this news comes days after he mentioned his desire to have a team of his own (so what is Astana then??!!). ITTET bicycle sales may be flatish but there will always be a market for the quality plywood products of Happy Lucky 88. In response to the need to stretch a buck HL88 has taken a page from FDR and issued a statement in a "fireside chat" (fueled by completely recycled HL88 products) that their engineers in some acronymed department have retooled the Prosperous Contented Obstruction Blocking faring to accept a plycra "vestibule of extended use and repose" to allow the user a smooth transition between high zoot cycling accessory and primary domicile. Sales are expected to be brisk as mortgage rates decline and foreclosures increase. Users can choose between models for 5/8ths or 1 and 3/16ths occupants (converting from HL88 engineer sizes to standard North American sizes....it kinda like the difference between Euro and Tahitian shoes sizes).

ITTET don't let houslessness keep you in the cold, be sure to order this quality product from any of your neighborhood HL88 retail outlets (found in Astana, Kazakhstan and Istanbul, Turkey).

While we wish our Astana colleagues all the best during this time of transition, we remind them that you must sleep in the bed you've made by hitching your wagon to THAT Wisconsin manufactory of dandy horses but invite them to our accommodations for roasted squirrel at any time during the Giro.