12.5.10

Johan's Sea-thing Rage

The recent comments by Dr. K2 concerning the merits of banning the "Heavy Drop" have enraged an already jowly Johan. Never known for his calm pacific temperament, Johan rose to the bait like a jack fish to a 5 of diamonds lure. "Full support of the team and my tactics is imperative", ejaculated Johan. "I don't give a **** what the UCI says, h20 must continue to attack unfairly. It is part of the fabric of Team Vitesse. We have a sponsor to satisfy whose integrity is intimately tied to the fortunes of Team Vitesse." Johan went on to spout, "Team Vitesse and its style of riding is immature, devilish and edgy as well as questionable. This maintains our high profile. As a result we are always in the news."
He had some choice words for the doctor as well. "If Dr. K2 doesn't toe the wire and hold the rudder, he will be forced to listen to Debussy's "La Mer". This brilliant exhibition of cascading motifs and shimmering orchestration will make the doctor wish he shared a room with a langoustine" rambled Johan.
It can be deduced from this diatribe that Johan is on form for another great season as the beloved and controversial manager of Team Vitesse.

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